I'll be the first to admit being lazy is a serious problem of mine, and many others throughout the fat-ass'd USA. But sometimes being lazy is fucking stupid.
These swag'd-up business men with this "blue tooth" technology. Are these fucking guys serious? Nothing stresses me more than to see some bro in his Infiniti driving down I-495 cherping away with a little blue-tooth in his ear. Holy hell, just use one hand and hold the phone, the other can still steer, I promise. Or those dudes walking around the airport with their blue-tooth shoved in their ear, all the while they think to themselves: "I look fucking cool, my tie, my suit, oh, and my fucking blue-tooth!" I'm not sure if they think they look more important, or they think when someone does finally call them, their hands will be so completely full that answering their blackberry will be seemingly impossible. God.
..Nothing is worse than a dude with a blue-tooth, well, actually there is one thing..
Those guys with there iPhone7 or whatever harnessed securely to their belt. no fucking way! This shit is ridiculous. If a pair of pants has a belt, most likely, it has fucking pockets. Just put your mobile in a pocket, holy shit.
Hopefully your phone has 4G, talk on brotherz.
J.Sketch
Only guy talk by only guyz
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Who is to blame? #Pervertz Part II
Am I really to blame, like fucking seriously. Who wouldn't look at the hot chicks in the gym with spandex and sports bras on looking like Ballet Total fitness commercial bitches. And then they have the fucking nerve to do lunges and run? You don't dress like that at the gym and then execute exercises that make everything bounce or excite the mind.
Now once again whoever made people made all men a certain way. I don't care if you are the pope you are sneaking a peak and that girl gets added to the mental memory bank. I'm not saying that a bro will go out of his way to go the gym at the same time to peep a shorty out and see if she could be a potential #d.a.b. Going back at the same time is acceptable if you talk to her and "rap" at the prospect. But making a habit of it with out conversation exceeds the sketchy point. That's when you turn into that stalker guy. A real #broham never ever turns into the stalker guy, he turns into LBJ in the fourth quarter against the Celtics in the playoffs, #clutch.
But once again it's not my fault at all for taking peeps in the gym at these two brunette manikin looking prospects. I don't think they mind it either...they come in when I lift.
Keep a watchful eye out my main bossez
J.A.S.
Now once again whoever made people made all men a certain way. I don't care if you are the pope you are sneaking a peak and that girl gets added to the mental memory bank. I'm not saying that a bro will go out of his way to go the gym at the same time to peep a shorty out and see if she could be a potential #d.a.b. Going back at the same time is acceptable if you talk to her and "rap" at the prospect. But making a habit of it with out conversation exceeds the sketchy point. That's when you turn into that stalker guy. A real #broham never ever turns into the stalker guy, he turns into LBJ in the fourth quarter against the Celtics in the playoffs, #clutch.
But once again it's not my fault at all for taking peeps in the gym at these two brunette manikin looking prospects. I don't think they mind it either...they come in when I lift.
Keep a watchful eye out my main bossez
J.A.S.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
We love our #Momz
Happy Mothers day to the most important women in the world, our two mothers. With out them then there would be no #LRTz or this #brotalk. We would never have even graced this cyber world with our words. So everyone in the world should say thanks to our two moms for having us.
Thank you to our moms for having us and raising us the way you did or we would not be here, typing away on the best blog #knowntobro! We love women, so lets just clear that up to everyone who thinks we don't. You all can go yell about @PerpWetness or something. We love our women or we wouldn't talk about them as much. But we love our moms the most, they are the two best women in the world and there is no debating that.
So thanks for being our moms and have the greatest Mothers day #knowntobro, from the #LRTz group!
Sincerely,
J.Sketch and J.A.S.
Thank you to our moms for having us and raising us the way you did or we would not be here, typing away on the best blog #knowntobro! We love women, so lets just clear that up to everyone who thinks we don't. You all can go yell about @PerpWetness or something. We love our women or we wouldn't talk about them as much. But we love our moms the most, they are the two best women in the world and there is no debating that.
So thanks for being our moms and have the greatest Mothers day #knowntobro, from the #LRTz group!
Sincerely,
J.Sketch and J.A.S.
Who is to blame? #Pervertz
Who doesn't like fake tits. Yes, they're artificial, but who the hell cares? Women pay thousands to have what I like to call #Treasure Chests. These chests are great, and the women who get them are brilliant. At times, I wonder to myself how I've become such a pervert, but I have come to the conclusion that it really isn't men's fault. Women are completely to blame.
Women and their tight ass clothing. How the fuck are we perverts? These chix strut around in fucking #jeggings, are we not supposed to look at your ass? Even society says, "Hey fellas, We are going to make it acceptable for women to walk around beaches in water-repellent underwear (bikinis), but you should not stare, get aroused, or even think about going to ask one of these women to fuck." You wonder why we approach you ladies with one thing in mind, and we all know what that is.
Back to fake tits or whatever they're called these days, what is the point of them? Sex appeal, I think. These girls want to look at us like we're fucking retards when we approach them wanting to #slaughterhouse. Well sorry women, Your fake ass titties told me to come over here. Your extra-mini bikini also insisted I walk over here. My Bad, sike. Fuck that. You spent thousands of dollars to gain some extra attention from bros, and then have the audacity to get mad at us when we want to #slamJam you. And no, not like #slamjam, but more like #SlamYou. But hey, we're the fucking perverts.
Bros, keep after them. But do take no for an answer, or well... you'll have some legal troubles. Good luck during "beach season 2011."
J.Sketch
Women and their tight ass clothing. How the fuck are we perverts? These chix strut around in fucking #jeggings, are we not supposed to look at your ass? Even society says, "Hey fellas, We are going to make it acceptable for women to walk around beaches in water-repellent underwear (bikinis), but you should not stare, get aroused, or even think about going to ask one of these women to fuck." You wonder why we approach you ladies with one thing in mind, and we all know what that is.
Back to fake tits or whatever they're called these days, what is the point of them? Sex appeal, I think. These girls want to look at us like we're fucking retards when we approach them wanting to #slaughterhouse. Well sorry women, Your fake ass titties told me to come over here. Your extra-mini bikini also insisted I walk over here. My Bad, sike. Fuck that. You spent thousands of dollars to gain some extra attention from bros, and then have the audacity to get mad at us when we want to #slamJam you. And no, not like #slamjam, but more like #SlamYou. But hey, we're the fucking perverts.
Bros, keep after them. But do take no for an answer, or well... you'll have some legal troubles. Good luck during "beach season 2011."
J.Sketch
Saturday, May 7, 2011
#SlamJam a bro's dream
For all of the bros who have ever wanted to jam out something vicious on a rim. Straight MJ or 'Nique something we have found the solution. It goes by the name of #SlamJam.
No its not "Slam Ball" the failed experiment on TNT when losers had to bounce off trampolines to jam on a ridiculously high rim. All you have to do is take a mini hoop and set that iron dream at around 8 feet and let the imagination flow.
Windmills, 360's, Tomahawks anything you can think of are available for the even average bro. You can jamz like your main boss LBJ or Kobe "Young Legz" Bryant. Hours can be spent jamming for your daily cardio to get that beach bod. Forget P90X and Tony whatever his name is and the sweet crossing of the forearms. That doesn't get you #swellz, Slam Jam does it all for you. Don't be in envy of the "brothas", you're and bro, you can do anything and we have figured out the way for a bro to jam just like the wanna be slam jammerz.
And if you are a real #SlamJam fan you will bring this to the office like my mans @Sheediddy14 and #SlamJam on your breaks between TPS reports and lunch.
Slam on brethren and enjoy, courtesy the dream weaver
J.A.S.
No its not "Slam Ball" the failed experiment on TNT when losers had to bounce off trampolines to jam on a ridiculously high rim. All you have to do is take a mini hoop and set that iron dream at around 8 feet and let the imagination flow.
Windmills, 360's, Tomahawks anything you can think of are available for the even average bro. You can jamz like your main boss LBJ or Kobe "Young Legz" Bryant. Hours can be spent jamming for your daily cardio to get that beach bod. Forget P90X and Tony whatever his name is and the sweet crossing of the forearms. That doesn't get you #swellz, Slam Jam does it all for you. Don't be in envy of the "brothas", you're and bro, you can do anything and we have figured out the way for a bro to jam just like the wanna be slam jammerz.
And if you are a real #SlamJam fan you will bring this to the office like my mans @Sheediddy14 and #SlamJam on your breaks between TPS reports and lunch.
Slam on brethren and enjoy, courtesy the dream weaver
J.A.S.
Friday, May 6, 2011
The Art Of Common #Courtesy
Common courtesy is always appreciated, but sometimes over-practiced. There are times where being nice actually isn't very nice, at all.
These predicaments blow my mind, if it was my dick, I wouldn't be complaining. But anyhow, this art I speak of is the all common "opening of a door." Most people open up or hold a door for fellow bros, ladies, and even complete strangers. But there is always that one person who is just too damn nice, and his common courtesy turns into a fucking burden. For example, I'll be damn near 20 yards from the door, and the dude wants to hold it and be a nice guy. Or, I'll be mid-way up the stairs, and dudes at the top of the steps just waiting and waiting.This courtesy then forces me to walk faster, rush, and sometimes even slightly jog. It sucks. I would rather just open the fucking door myself, honestly. Meanwhile, as your rushing and knowing this door holder is making everything a fucking hassle, you have to approach him with a smile, and even say thank you. Because you know, if there is one thing worse than the premature door holder, its holding the door for an asshole that doesn't say thank you.
Just time it right, fellaz. If you're going to hold the door, please, only do it if it makes life easier for the bro behind you. Dude's Dueces.
Big Upz to a fellow bro, yes, literally my bro. He surfaced the idea and has been a victim of these 'over the top' door crimes, go head and follow him up @JkSutch23.
J.Sketch
These predicaments blow my mind, if it was my dick, I wouldn't be complaining. But anyhow, this art I speak of is the all common "opening of a door." Most people open up or hold a door for fellow bros, ladies, and even complete strangers. But there is always that one person who is just too damn nice, and his common courtesy turns into a fucking burden. For example, I'll be damn near 20 yards from the door, and the dude wants to hold it and be a nice guy. Or, I'll be mid-way up the stairs, and dudes at the top of the steps just waiting and waiting.This courtesy then forces me to walk faster, rush, and sometimes even slightly jog. It sucks. I would rather just open the fucking door myself, honestly. Meanwhile, as your rushing and knowing this door holder is making everything a fucking hassle, you have to approach him with a smile, and even say thank you. Because you know, if there is one thing worse than the premature door holder, its holding the door for an asshole that doesn't say thank you.
Just time it right, fellaz. If you're going to hold the door, please, only do it if it makes life easier for the bro behind you. Dude's Dueces.
Big Upz to a fellow bro, yes, literally my bro. He surfaced the idea and has been a victim of these 'over the top' door crimes, go head and follow him up @JkSutch23.
J.Sketch
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
#Gym Etiquette - Part II
Here we are again, speaking of the gym. The gym is a great place, but like i said before, some #swellerz are just too much.
These meat-monsters who have a tendency to pace before a set, back and forth, back and forth. Its like, does he want me to go do the fucking set for him. Just #chellz fellas, do not sit there and do a few minutes of light cardio, pacing over and over before a set to make sure your mind is right, its the fucking gym, not a history test. Or, actually, why the hell do people do that? It is to prepare the mind? Shit, I don't even know. But, I do know this: when those meat-monsters are doing their pacing, they get fueled by the attention people like myself give to them. Well, Pace-makers, the audience you've created is looking at you in a complete and utter "what the fuck are you doing?" way.
This is part II, so I have to talk about this whole spotting situation. Gym bandits, if you do happen to disregard all #gym etiquette and make another #swellington take out his ear phones to ask: "Hey buddy, can I have a spot?" Please, please, Jesus and all heavens, let us provide a proper fucking spot for you. Do not shout, "I got it" when 200 and some odd pounds is falling onto your chest and your eyes are bulging from the sockets. You did ask me to spot you, right? And, the point of a spotter is for safety, right again? But hey, fuck it, I'll just stand here and listen to my iTouch while this barbell crushes your sternum.
Get her next time, bro. Pace on, Indiana.
J.Sketch
These meat-monsters who have a tendency to pace before a set, back and forth, back and forth. Its like, does he want me to go do the fucking set for him. Just #chellz fellas, do not sit there and do a few minutes of light cardio, pacing over and over before a set to make sure your mind is right, its the fucking gym, not a history test. Or, actually, why the hell do people do that? It is to prepare the mind? Shit, I don't even know. But, I do know this: when those meat-monsters are doing their pacing, they get fueled by the attention people like myself give to them. Well, Pace-makers, the audience you've created is looking at you in a complete and utter "what the fuck are you doing?" way.
This is part II, so I have to talk about this whole spotting situation. Gym bandits, if you do happen to disregard all #gym etiquette and make another #swellington take out his ear phones to ask: "Hey buddy, can I have a spot?" Please, please, Jesus and all heavens, let us provide a proper fucking spot for you. Do not shout, "I got it" when 200 and some odd pounds is falling onto your chest and your eyes are bulging from the sockets. You did ask me to spot you, right? And, the point of a spotter is for safety, right again? But hey, fuck it, I'll just stand here and listen to my iTouch while this barbell crushes your sternum.
Get her next time, bro. Pace on, Indiana.
J.Sketch
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